In Which I Give In To Peer Pressure

(Translation: “Skyla made me do it.”)

Now, you all know how I feel about self-publishing. However, in response to those wishing to purchase my work, I have agreed to offer my previously-published short stories for sale in a new format. (I justify doing this by telling myself and being assured by others that it’s not really self-publishing because these stories have been previously commercially published, so this is a re-release rather than self-publishing. GO WITH IT. I NEED TO BELIEVE THIS IN ORDER TO LIVE WITH MYSELF/THIS DECISION I FEEL SO DIRTY OH MY GOD.)

Anyway.

This is the first of three planned volumes of Legends of the Destrati (formerly published in the Mammoth anthologies and my Light In A Dark World collection, so if you’ve already read those stories, there’s nothing new for you here).

This volume features the first two stories, “Play Dead” and “In From The Cold.” The shiny cover was done by the lovely tyrant enabler Skyla Dawn Cameron of Indigochick Designs, as was the formatting of all the necessary files. Because she rocks. Go use her for everything you need done digitally. She’s amazing and worth every penny.

So here you go. I’m not quite sure when the next one will be out, but I plan to have all three parts out by the end of the year. Plan, mind you. It might not work out that way. But here to kick off your October are some lovely, lovely vampires. You’re welcome.

Introducing Sadistic Crits!

Logo by Indigo Chick Designs

Logo by Indigo Chick Designs

After speaking with my cadre of enablers, I have decided to open my own special brand of writing critique services. Keep in mind, this is not your average feedback. This service is for those writers serious enough about their craft to brave the merciless blade of the Gothic Goddess Herself.

You really think you have what it takes to be a professional-grade writer? Because this shit ain’t for the thin-skinned. Professional writing is a tough business and, to survive it, you need to be even tougher.

Think of the toughest person you know. You’ll have to be TOUGHER THAN THEM.

I do not use a red pen. I use a flail and scalpel. Your work (and through it, you, personally) will bleed, and possibly die. If you survive, you’ll come out better, stronger, scarred, and without any illusion at all about your work.

Having said that, do keep in mind I am not purposefully cruel. I am honest, and honesty can (and should) be absolutely brutal. If your writing is solid, I will say that. I do not intentionally look for things I can pick at. That means more work for me, and while I don’t shy away from hard work, the less I have to do, the better I like it.

So, if you’ve the courage and fortitude to enter my lair, have a look at the options below. A great deal of thought and consideration has gone into this price guide, so I don’t want to hear any whining about it. If you whine at all, this is not the place for you. As the credo of the Evil League of Evil Writers says, I do not tolerate whining, crying, sniveling, whimpering or bawling about writing, publishing, or any aspect thereof.

Still here? Very well. Here is how much my time and attention will cost you. I am open to any genre (including erotica).

(Please note I require a 50% down payment for all services below.):

Query Only – $25.00

Query + 1st Chapter – $45.00

Query + 3 Chapters – $100.00

Query + 5 Chapters – $150.00


Choose Your Query Package (Down Payment)



The balance will be due upon completion of the crit. You can also pay by credit card through Paypal if you don’t have a Paypal account.

Chapters Only – $25.00 PER CHAPTER (up to 20 pages per chapter – limit 10 chapters). Email me at crits [at] dinajames [dot] com if you wish to purchase this option.

Whole Manuscript – $500.00 or $1.00 per page, whichever is greater (125,000 word limit)




Note: If your full manuscript ends up going over $500.00, the balance will be billed to you upon delivery of your crit.

Refund Policy
If I cannot complete your crit for any reason other than your manuscript sucking so bad I can’t read another word without vomiting blood (in this case, I will send it back to you with a “fuck this shit” note and keep your money), you will be entitled to a full refund of your down payment. Other than that, all sales are final and no amount of whining at me because you don’t like what I said will avail you.

What You Get Back:

Your crit will include comments and a 1-2 page summary of my thoughts. If you did well, you’ll get a kitten picture with your crit summary.

All materials submitted for critique are required to be in manuscript format (double-spaced, 12 point font, .doc file).

Turnaround Time:

This depends on my schedule, how many people are ahead of you in the queue, and what package you choose. You’re welcome to email me at crits [at] dinajames [dot] com and ask about my current availability.

Your material will be returned to you with one of the following grades:

A-GradeReady. The Force is strong with you. You are ready to take the trials. Go query an agent and stop wasting time and money on pats on the head.

 

 

B-GradeCoherent. I can see what you’re trying to do here. Clean yourself up and you’ll be ready.

 

 

 

C-GradeLegible. You can make words, I’ll give you that. They don’t make any sense put together, but you can make them.

 

 

D-GradeSordid. You can spell your name, and you’ve got some words written down here. I think they’re words. It’s hard to tell.

 

 

F-Grade – Disgusting. You’re not capable of writing your own name, let alone a novel. Stop abusing the keyboard until you learn to not make it cry.

 

 

 

Who Are You To Offer This?
If you have to ask, you really shouldn’t be here.

 

Have a question I haven’t answered here?

Email me at crits [at] dinajames [dot] com.

Bite Me: A Stranger Things Story (Free)

As promised, one man-wolf (not wolf-man), free for your viewing pleasure.

It’s hard not to be resentful when someone comes along and takes everything over, and Billy has had enough. Just because someone saved your life doesn’t mean they own it.

Set between Time Heals and the unpublished Death Knell, this story focuses on Billy the man-wolf (not wolf-man) and his uneasy relationship with Noth, the young hellhound with whom he must now share all that’s dear to him.

BiteMeST

Bite Me: A Stranger Things Story
(Note: This story is only available in PDF format for the foreseeable future. If you would like another format, I’m sorry. You’ll have to make do.)

Here is the promised story I wrote for the Dina Wants A Shiny Thing “fundraiser.” I put “fundraiser” in quotation marks because this isn’t really about raising funds. Raising funds is a side effect of this story. Why a side effect?

Because it’s completely up to you to toss some pennies my way for this story.

This story is for you. Absolutely and totally free. Go on. Open it. Download it. Save a copy to your hard drive for your reading pleasure. All I ask is that you not upload it to pirate sites/torrent it. Why not? Because pirates are assholes and THIS IS ALREADY HERE FOR FREE. Also, you can’t upload the “donate” button to a torrent site, and it’s right here on this page with the story for everyone to see. Pirates don’t pay for things. Because they’re pirates. You get it. However, if you want to sacrifice your daily latte to the Shiny Thing fund today, I’d be appreciative.

Now, I’m not going to suggest an amount – I’m going to leave that up to you. I would remind you that the average price of an entire paperback novel is somewhere around $8.00US while a hardcover runs about $25.00US, and this is a short story. This is maybe a tenth of a novel here. When I talk about donating pennies, that’s exactly what I mean. However, your pennies are exactly that – yours. I’m not going to tell you how to spend them.

Here’s the button to do that:

Now, what’s the shiny thing I want? This. I want this:

Image by Design Toscano

Image by Design Toscano

You expected it to be yarn, didn’t you? I can understand that. Tell you what. If this little story makes enough, I’ll get the statue AND some yarn. Hell, I may go wild and buy yarn AND tea with my newfound riches. You never know what no-goodness I’ll get up to with cash in hand.

But I don’t expect something for nothing, so here’s your story. If you want to read it before you dig through the couch cushions for loose change (no old M&Ms, please – they are not accepted currency in my country. Don’t ask how I know this.), go right ahead. This story is free to everyone. Should you decide at some point that you wish to fund the Shiny Thing, click on the “donate” button you see up there and put a few coins in my tip jar. And hey, if you can’t or don’t want to fund the shiny, that’s cool. The story is there for you to read for free.

When the shiny thing comes, I will remove the donate link and print out every donor’s name on a sticker and affix it to the bottom of the statue, so that I will always remember those who made it possible. It will rest in a place of honor by my desk and inspire me to write more.

Thank you all in advance for your pennies. I very much appreciate each and every one of you.

Happy Release Day!

For those waiting for more Kyle, today is the day! Light in a Dark World: Legends of the Destrati is out and available for your reading pleasure!

There at the site you can purchase the book in any format you like. As for third party resellers, here’s generally how it goes:

Kindle is available approximately 24hrs after the release on Mundania’s site.

Amazon: About a week after release (5-8 days).

B&N: About a week after release in print.

Nook: Mundania doesn’t currently upload directly to Nook but it’s available in EPUB format at Mundania & will also be at various other resellers.

All Romance eBooks: 2-3 days after release.

All other resellers like BookDepository, etc, usually have things about a week or two later.

When I have buy links to those places, I’ll post them here.

Now I go to drink tea and go to work on other projects! Enjoy Kyle!

P.S. I’m planning a giveaway at some point. I’m just too busy right now to think about it. Too many irons in the fire, but there will be a giveaway soon!

A Thank You Post For The Fans

All I can say is “wow.”

OMG you guys, wow.

Thank you for all the pimpage and support and love and comments and fan mail and everything. You are all so freakin’ awesome and I very much appreciate each and every one of you.

All Wounds has been out for a little over a month now and I’m overwhelmed by the continuing response to it. Like this: As of this writing, my debut novel is number 7 in the fantasy category on the Barnes & Noble Fictionwise ebook site. This would not have been possible without the support of you all. You also love me on Goodreads and Amazon.

So thank you, my wonderful fans, friends and family! You all are the very best, and I’m grateful for your faith in me.

Much appreciation,
Dina (And Rebecca, Syd, Ryan, Billy and Nana)

AW TY Card

Thanks For Biting! My Fans Rock!

Links for those who have asked for them again:

All Wounds at Mundania (Publisher, all formats available, print and ebook)

All Wounds on Amazon (Kindle and print available)

All Wounds on Amazon UK (Kindle and print available)

All Wounds at Barnes & Noble (print and ebook)

All Wounds at the Book Depository (print and ebook)

It’s Here! It’s Release Day!

Look! Look! All Wounds is here!

I’m overwhelmed, really. Thank you to so many people for not only making this possible, but for supporting me and promoting me and just generally being awesome. I have the best friends, and the coolest fans. You all rock!

I mean, Ilona Andrews has me featured on her blog’s sidebar under friend’s release (scroll down to the bottom – I need to figure out how to do something like this on my own site), Lilith Saintcrow (the Bad Horse of the ELEW) pimps me out her blog post today, Skyla Dawn Cameron does the same…wow. Just…wow, you guys. Thanks.

Because you are all so cool, I’ll give you all a little treat. I’ll post a very short excerpt of the book. Short because I’m evil. (But you knew that.)

All Rebecca really wanted to do was go to sleep, take care of her nana, and go to school in the morning and deal with Marla Thompson like normal.

Instead she was sitting at a table with a werewolf and a vampire, listening to them discuss how best to raid a demon lair.

All right, all right. Since you are all SO awesome, I’ll throw one of my Evil Giveaway things. Not just yet, though. I’ll need to see if I can procure something evil for it first. If the evil works, BWAH-HA-HA-HA! If it does not, we’ll have the giveaway without it.

I now go in search of this new devilry.

Stay tuned. We’re gonna kick it up a notch in the next day or so.

Preview – there will be PRIZES. Hee!

WARNING: RANTAGE

Abandon hope all ye who enter here.

Like the pirate talk? It’s appropriate, because I’m going to rant in this post about e-piracy. This post will have language and various other “Dina has been sent into orbit” visuals.

You have been warned. NSFW, 18+, etc.

Still here? Read on. Continue reading

Dina Leaves The Lair. In Broad Daylight. On Purpose.

I know, I know. I’m shocked too. Don’t faint. I know it’s a rare occasion. I usually hide between the spring and autumn equinoxes, not only from the daylight, but from tourists and kids out of school for the summer. I emerge sometime after Labor Day and celebrate the return to normalcy.

But! I don’t pick the times or dates for certain things, and if there’s something I want to go to scheduled in the middle of summer, well…I have to leave the lair. One of those things is a writing seminar scheduled for this weekend (June 3-5) that I’ll be attending. It’s James Scott Bell’s Selling Your Novel and Screenplay Intensive Seminar in Sherman Oaks, CA.

While this doesn’t technically count as “an appearance” as I’m there for the seminar and not to sign books*, I plan to have a drink or two at the hotel bar in the evenings if you want to come say hi! I’ll warn you all now – I have dinner plans both Friday and Saturday evening, so I’m not sure when I’ll be at the bar. Watch my Twitter for when I’ll be there. I’m a night person, and so it will probably be late. Like toward closing time. Unless I stay out late at dinner partying or something. Hey, I’m a writer. Things could happen.

I’m not taking my laptop, so I won’t be checking email or Facebook or anything. Please hold all catastrophes and end of the world events until Monday, June 6. I don’t have one of those fancy phones or an i-Thingy that lets me do all that stuff, either. I have a cell that sends text messages to Twitter, but I can’t read Twitter on it. So there you have it. I will be…*gasp*…out of touch!

So there you have it. I’ll be gone this weekend. Plan accordingly and have the mess cleaned up by the time I get home. I’m outtie. I solemnly swear I am up to no good. There will be witnesses. Hopefully there will not be news coverage or jail time.

(*Though I won’t be offended if you bring books you want me to sign when I’m not “in class.”)

Con Artist -or- Surly Writer’s Con

It’s amazing what random things inspire a writer. This morning it was a hashtag on Twitter about yet another convention I’ve never heard about, and it made me scowl. I mean… Continue reading