I Solemnly Swear I Am Up To No Good

So…there’s this…thing. It’s not really a SEKRIT thing, it’s just a…work in progress thing. My enabler handler friend Skyla Dawn Cameron has a project coming out soon [Patreon link: PAY UP, BECAUSE SHE IS MADE OF WIN] and has, despite both my better judgment AND willingness to participate in such shenanigans (who am I kidding? I’m always up for shenanigans!), convinced me to join her in its fruition. (She has a knack for doing this – she knows what buttons to push/tribute to offer.)

I can’t say much right now, as it’s still in development, but once the details are hammered out, I will share it with you.

I am up to no good. There will be vampires involved.

Octoberness

So it’s October. Summer in the northern hemisphere is officially dead and gone, without even a hint of it on the breeze (FINALLY!). Everything now is pumpkins and apples and fleece and flannel.

I kicked off the month over at the Evil League of Evil Writers with a post about playing nicely with others.

I had more, but I’m too busy purring about the fact that it’s October to think more.

evil laugh gif Tom

Oh, I suppose I could say something about how I have a Halloween freebie story I wrote last year up on the site. (It’s the same one as last year, so if you’ve read that one already, there’s nothing new. Just thought I’d throw out the reminder, because hey, Halloween and pumpkins, and that gorgeous cover by Skyla Dawn Cameron of IndigoChick Designs.)

TreatMeRigh-lg

So there you are. Now, back to October.

pumpkin-man

The Light Returneth

And with it, my hibernation looms.

It’s going to be April here in a few days, you guys. APRIL. DO YOU KNOW WHAT THAT MEANS? It means tourists and light and all kinds of shit I really, really don’t want to deal with.

Tom Hiddleston You Have No Idea What It Does To Me

It means I will go to ground soon and wait for September to return once more. I really need to become a reverse snowbird and go south for the summer like the ski-people do. I need a “summer home” in New Zealand or Chile or somewhere so I can escape the hot season and everything it brings with it. I never want to know a day that’s over 60 degrees. (15.5 for you Celsius people)

Until then, I’ll have to content myself with my dark curtains and air conditioning to get me through the bright days ahead.

I have been convinced to make one public appearance before I withdraw from the evil daystar for the next six months. Special thanks to author K.L. Bone for her kind invitation to join her for booze and books at a local vineyard on April 2.

SPN Sam Books Without Pics

Bethany Vineyards of Ridgefield, Washington, is hosting the second annual Words on the Vine book signing on Saturday April 2nd at 2:00PM, and I’ll be there along with her and a few other authors.

Bethany Vineyards
4115 NE 259th St. Ridgefield, WA

Other attending authors are:
USA Today Bestselling Author Sarah M. Cradit
NY Times Bestselling Author Brandy L. Rivers
Pacific Northwest poet Shane Chase
Special Guest Greg Wilkey
Blythe Ayne

There will be some special shinies available at this event that are exclusive to signings and giveaways. That is, they are not available (nor will they ever be) for retail sale, so I hope to see you there.

Despite what it says on some of the promotional materials, I have respectfully declined to read from my work at this event. It will be a signing only for me, but there will be plenty of excerpts being read by the other authors there if you’re into that kind of thing.

Come join me in bidding farewell to the light!

Crow Pets Cat

New Year, More Vampires

It’s 2016. It’s also halfway through January, which means your New Year’s resolutions should be wearing a bit thin by now. Well, I’m here to help those of you who resolved to read more books, and those who wanted to add more vampires to their life.

You all know I’ve given into peer pressure (translation: “Skyla made me do it.”) AND how I feel about self-publishing. However, in response to those wishing to purchase my work, I have agreed to offer my previously-published short stories for sale in a new format. (I justify doing this by telling myself and being assured by others that it’s not really self-publishing because these stories have been previously commercially published, so this is a re-release rather than self-publishing. GO WITH IT. I NEED TO BELIEVE THIS IN ORDER TO LIVE WITH MYSELF/THIS DECISION I FEEL SO DIRTY OH MY GOD.)

Anyway.

Here is the final volume of Legends of the Destrati (formerly published in the Mammoth anthologies and my Light In A Dark World collection, so if you’ve already read those stories, there’s nothing new for you here).

This volume features the last two stories, “Redemption” and “A Hope and a Prayer,” plus a bonus story, “Unmasked.” The shiny cover was done by the lovely tyrant enabler Skyla Dawn Cameron of Indigochick Designs, as was the formatting of all the necessary files. Because she rocks. Go use her for everything you need done digitally. She’s amazing and worth every penny.

That’s all the shiny I currently have planned. The year is young, though, and we all know how much I enjoy getting up to no good. For now, enjoy your 2016 with the beautiful and enigmatic Kyle.

Vampires For The Holidays

You all know I’ve given into peer pressure (translation: “Skyla made me do it.”) AND how I feel about self-publishing. However, in response to those wishing to purchase my work, I have agreed to offer my previously-published short stories for sale in a new format. (I justify doing this by telling myself and being assured by others that it’s not really self-publishing because these stories have been previously commercially published, so this is a re-release rather than self-publishing. GO WITH IT. I NEED TO BELIEVE THIS IN ORDER TO LIVE WITH MYSELF/THIS DECISION I FEEL SO DIRTY OH MY GOD.)

Anyway.

Here is the second of three planned volumes of Legends of the Destrati (formerly published in the Mammoth anthologies and my Light In A Dark World collection, so if you’ve already read those stories, there’s nothing new for you here).

This volume features the next two stories, “With Great Power” and “Deliver Us From Evil.” The shiny cover was done by the lovely tyrant enabler Skyla Dawn Cameron of Indigochick Designs, as was the formatting of all the necessary files. Because she rocks. Go use her for everything you need done digitally. She’s amazing and worth every penny.

So here you go. I’m not quite sure when the next one will be out, but probably right around the New Year. Plan, mind you. It might not work out that way. But here to kick off your December are some lovely, lovely vampires. You’re welcome.

Trick or Treat!

I’ve spent the last few weeks brewing up this Halloween treat in my cauldron of doom, just for my mischievous readers. I’m not going to blurb what goes on in this story, because Halloween is about spooky surprises and scary monsters. And candy. And pumpkins.

Enjoy!

Click the pic below to download the PDF. (As this is a free story, this is the only format it’s going to be available in.)

TreatMeRigh-lg

Cover art and formatting done by the wonderfully talented IndigoChick Designs.

In Which I Give In To Peer Pressure

(Translation: “Skyla made me do it.”)

Now, you all know how I feel about self-publishing. However, in response to those wishing to purchase my work, I have agreed to offer my previously-published short stories for sale in a new format. (I justify doing this by telling myself and being assured by others that it’s not really self-publishing because these stories have been previously commercially published, so this is a re-release rather than self-publishing. GO WITH IT. I NEED TO BELIEVE THIS IN ORDER TO LIVE WITH MYSELF/THIS DECISION I FEEL SO DIRTY OH MY GOD.)

Anyway.

This is the first of three planned volumes of Legends of the Destrati (formerly published in the Mammoth anthologies and my Light In A Dark World collection, so if you’ve already read those stories, there’s nothing new for you here).

This volume features the first two stories, “Play Dead” and “In From The Cold.” The shiny cover was done by the lovely tyrant enabler Skyla Dawn Cameron of Indigochick Designs, as was the formatting of all the necessary files. Because she rocks. Go use her for everything you need done digitally. She’s amazing and worth every penny.

So here you go. I’m not quite sure when the next one will be out, but I plan to have all three parts out by the end of the year. Plan, mind you. It might not work out that way. But here to kick off your October are some lovely, lovely vampires. You’re welcome.

Bite Me: A Stranger Things Story (Free)

As promised, one man-wolf (not wolf-man), free for your viewing pleasure.

It’s hard not to be resentful when someone comes along and takes everything over, and Billy has had enough. Just because someone saved your life doesn’t mean they own it.

Set between Time Heals and the unpublished Death Knell, this story focuses on Billy the man-wolf (not wolf-man) and his uneasy relationship with Noth, the young hellhound with whom he must now share all that’s dear to him.

BiteMeST

Bite Me: A Stranger Things Story
(Note: This story is only available in PDF format for the foreseeable future. If you would like another format, I’m sorry. You’ll have to make do.)

Here is the promised story I wrote for the Dina Wants A Shiny Thing “fundraiser.” I put “fundraiser” in quotation marks because this isn’t really about raising funds. Raising funds is a side effect of this story. Why a side effect?

Because it’s completely up to you to toss some pennies my way for this story.

This story is for you. Absolutely and totally free. Go on. Open it. Download it. Save a copy to your hard drive for your reading pleasure. All I ask is that you not upload it to pirate sites/torrent it. Why not? Because pirates are assholes and THIS IS ALREADY HERE FOR FREE. Also, you can’t upload the “donate” button to a torrent site, and it’s right here on this page with the story for everyone to see. Pirates don’t pay for things. Because they’re pirates. You get it. However, if you want to sacrifice your daily latte to the Shiny Thing fund today, I’d be appreciative.

Now, I’m not going to suggest an amount – I’m going to leave that up to you. I would remind you that the average price of an entire paperback novel is somewhere around $8.00US while a hardcover runs about $25.00US, and this is a short story. This is maybe a tenth of a novel here. When I talk about donating pennies, that’s exactly what I mean. However, your pennies are exactly that – yours. I’m not going to tell you how to spend them.

Here’s the button to do that:

Now, what’s the shiny thing I want? This. I want this:

Image by Design Toscano

Image by Design Toscano

You expected it to be yarn, didn’t you? I can understand that. Tell you what. If this little story makes enough, I’ll get the statue AND some yarn. Hell, I may go wild and buy yarn AND tea with my newfound riches. You never know what no-goodness I’ll get up to with cash in hand.

But I don’t expect something for nothing, so here’s your story. If you want to read it before you dig through the couch cushions for loose change (no old M&Ms, please – they are not accepted currency in my country. Don’t ask how I know this.), go right ahead. This story is free to everyone. Should you decide at some point that you wish to fund the Shiny Thing, click on the “donate” button you see up there and put a few coins in my tip jar. And hey, if you can’t or don’t want to fund the shiny, that’s cool. The story is there for you to read for free.

When the shiny thing comes, I will remove the donate link and print out every donor’s name on a sticker and affix it to the bottom of the statue, so that I will always remember those who made it possible. It will rest in a place of honor by my desk and inspire me to write more.

Thank you all in advance for your pennies. I very much appreciate each and every one of you.

Something Shiny This Way Comes

So, remember this post from last year where I talk about how Dina Wants A Shiny Thing and I did a poll to see if there was any interest in a Billy short?

Yeah, that.

Well, stuff and things happened, and the short got pushed to the side, and more stuff and things happened, and now, well….

Let’s just say Something Shiny is on the way. I don’t have an exact date yet, but it shouldn’t be long now!

Why am I posting this here?

Because I feed on your sweet, sweet torment, that’s why!