Just kidding.

If you’re here, you probably want to know about #dietgame on Twitter. Well, you’ve come to the right place.

Background: Last year, on September 3, my Wii Fit made bad jokes about how much time had passed since my last workout and made the Noise of Disappointment when it did my body test that morning. So, of course, I wrote it a nasty tweet in return, announcing my weight loss goals in an effort to ensure some kind of accountability besides that of the Evil Wii Fit. (That thing is EVIL, I tell you, and not in the good way!)

Long story short, #dietgame has been invented. It’s like #wordathon for weight loss.

In that regard, here are the “rules”.

1) You must have a weight loss goal.

2) You must start as soon as possible/as soon as you find out about this.

3) The start and end dates are posted above.

4) You must TELL ME (in addition to your mom/significant other/morale support groups as I keep track weekly on a spreadsheet so I can determine repercu- I mean – see who hasn’t given their results yet) that you’re participating.

5) You must tweet your progress (or comment here if you’re joining us via somewhere else and aren’t on Twitter) at least once a week (Monday is good, as it’s the day we’re going to end this round). Use the hashtag #dietgame so that the rest of us playing can kick your – um…”offer encouragement”.

Other things:

Your weight loss goal does not have to be pounds. It can be inches, body fat percentage, clothes size, whatever. This is a motivational/accountability exercise/encouragement/ass-kicking group, “sponsored” by yours truly and @Zombie_Joe.

This is a FRIENDLY competition, but those of you who play #wordathon know I have an alter ego in the form of #gunnyjames. This is my R. Lee Ermey-style motivation-by-degradation, and you will get screamed at and told to get your lazy ass on the treadmill if #gunnyjames is in-or-pro-voked. Mocking by other participants may also be involved, and there will be no sympathy to be found here. You want sympathy, you shouldn’t be taking on #dietgame.

Like #wordathon, there is no “winner” or “prize”. This is about reaching a goal, and that goal can be in pounds lost, percentage lost and percentage of goal reached. Suppose we reach the end date and the best among those playing #dietgame have only reached 80% of their goal? Well, that person “wins”.

Now, this is not a “diet” or “weight loss plan”. You do your own thing. Whatever works for you/however you want to lose weight. There are no suggestions, we’re not all joining Weight Watchers or going on the South Beach Diet or Atkins or whatever. This, like the way we #wordathon players write, is highly individual. You do whatever works for you. Some of us do a daily thing, some of us push hard a couple days a week, some of us wait until the last minute, whatever. However you want to do it. Up to you. This is a motivational thing/friendly competition, NOT an advice column. Play at your own risk, etc. etc., no one assumes any liability for your weight loss or lack thereof, blah blah blah, etc. etc.

So, you in?