Days since I’ve Twittered: 3
Weeks since I’ve blogged: 3
Days since I’ve vlogged: 30
Methinks I detect a pattern there.
Now, what have I been doing all this time, you ask.
Writing over 5k words a day, that’s what.
I’ve been in the throes of a massive rewrite of “All Wounds” – the novel version.
Yesterday – the day I reached the end of the last chapter – was a record day for me.
9,870 new words written yesterday. 2.5 chapters. With copy/paste/edits from the previous version included? 11,324.
This past week? 37,682 words. 9 reconstructed chapters – 5 of which were completely new/from scratch.
Needless to say, I’m a little tired.
I have been subsisting on Pepsi, chicken salad sandwiches and tea.
Lots and lots of tea.
When I reached the end of my rewrite at about 2AM last night, I was so grateful when I fell into bed. I never wanted to write another word ever again.
Then I slept for several hours, got up, fed the animals and thought – “I think I’ll write a blog about this.”
*facepalm* I guess that just goes to show that I’m an addict.
If I owe you an e-mail: I’m catching up on a lot of things, namely sleep. I’ll write you soon!
To everyone and everything else I’ve neglected of late – my sincerest apologies and everlasting thanks for your patience and understanding. This last week was one of the hardest I’ve ever been through in my professional writing life, and I absolutely loved it to bits and pieces.
What? I work well under pressure! Why do you think I always waited until the night before a test to bother looking at the notes I was supposed to take in class? (Don’t answer that.)
I’m not saying that I didn’t have my “OMG I FRAKKING HATE THIS TO HELL WITH BEING A PROFESSIONAL WRITER!” moments. Those closest to me know that I’m not all hearts and flowers on my best day, and when I’m stressed/worried/in pain/busy or any combination of the above, I’m even worse.
There were more than a few times when I would wake up from one of my breaks (I was working on a round-the-clock schedule of up for three hours, write for three hours with little breaks for food and other life’s necessities sprinkled in between) when I would dread having to go back into my office and sit in that chair and make with the words, but they were just that:
It’s when you put down the pen for good that it’s not all right.
I’m also not saying that I haven’t done this before. There was a period of about five years where I didn’t write a word. Not one, except maybe the occasional e-mail. Then one day a character grabbed me by the throat and the story just flowed.
I understand now, what happened that day. There are times when I miss that feeling; that rush of near-overpowering creativity, when you can’t type/write/get the words out fast enough. I understand now that it was indeed a “rush” of creativity. A flood. That was because it had all been dammed up inside me for those five years that I didn’t write.
You can’t do that to a writer/creative person and not expect it to pour out in a massive chaotic torrent at some point.
Lilith Saintcrow has a phenomenal blog on showing up for your Muse in spite of how you, personally, feel. If you’re not reading her blog, you’re missing out.
I’ve missed out on a lot while I’ve been sequestered in my own little world, and I know that.
But that’s how I roll. How I work. It’s no surprise to me that the return of my creativity – when my character introduced themselves to me and their story flowed out of me like a river overrunning its banks – coincided with the killing of my cable television subscription well over seven years ago now.
I’m of the mind that TV kills creativity. Those who watch my vlogs know that I’m anti-TV. Not anti-film, mind you – I love movies.
But I hate television. Especially commercials.
And wouldn’t you know, I have a character that is addicted to television. ESPECIALLY COMMERCIALS. *facepalm* Serves me right, that one.
So yes, I’ve missed so many blogs/Tweets/articles/updates in my absence, but I willingly pay the price of a little (blissful?) ignorance in favor of spending time with my characters.
I need that alone time when I’m under pressure/a deadline. It’s what I do – I turn everything off that distracts me and knuckle under. I strip my life to the skeleton and only run what’s absolutely necessary. My friends and animals despise me for it, and my husband becomes a temporary Word widower, but they all understand that “I’m writing”.
Of course, I’m always writing, but they know the difference.
Now to pop the top on my last Pepsi and go watch one of my Netflix selections.
What? It’s my last Pepsi! I ran out of chocolate days ago.
Believe me, that was a crisis. If it weren’t for the frozen fries, there’d have been a real problem.
Told you I was difficult when I’m on a deadline.
Wouldn’t trade it for anything, though. LOVE it.
(Someone remind me I said that should my editor send back my week of hard labor telling me to do it all again, only with ninjas and aliens. P.S. Dear Editor, if you’re reading this, that wasn’t meant to give you ideas. Thanks.)